Showing posts with label free. Show all posts
Showing posts with label free. Show all posts

Monday, July 20, 2015

Hindi / Urdu Adult SMS Jokes {New, Free & Funny}




Full Time Masti … Non stop fun

6 Inch ka hai.
.
Size normal he
.
.

Mazboot he

.
.
Ziyadah mota bhi nahin he
.
.
2 larkiyan dekh chuki hain
.
.
Lena he to bolo?
Full Time Masti
Non stop Fun
Mera…
.
LG KG 195

Usne utari saree…

Usne utari saree
fir aayi peticoat ki bari
blouse to pahle hi diya tha utar
ziyadah excited mat ho yaar
yeh tha kapray sukhane ka taar ….!

Nikal lena apna ATM

Insan jb pehli bar dalta hy to wo confuse hota hay
magar tum na ghabrana or dal dena
tum jese hi rakho ge wo khud andar chala jaye ga
phir thumein acha lagnay lagay ga
or
phir ajeeb ajeeb awazen ayen gi,
or phr jub tumhari money nikal jaye
to tum nikal lena apna ATM

Pehlay KISS karo, phir palang per litao

Pehle KISS karo,
phir PALANG per leta do,
phir CHADDI utar do,
phir NICHE haath lagao,
.
.
.
.
Aur check karo k
BABY ne SU SU to nahi kiya na

Maa Gaon mein Fauji aaye hain

Beti: Maa Gaon mein Fauji aaye hain
Maa: andar aaja inki niyat bahut kharab hoti hai
Beti: Maa fauji Pakistani hain
Maa: to bakri ko bhi andar le aa.

Larkion ko ezzat do

“Larkiyo Ko Ezzat Do
Q Ke Agr Aaj Tum Un Ko Ezzat Do Gay
To Kal Ko ho skta hai k
Wo B Tum Ko Apni Ezzat Day Den”…
(Professor Dr. Imran Hashmi)

Dil kerta hai tujhey kuttay k agay dal dun


Train mai aik husband apni wife say:
tujh say shadi ker k pachta raha hun
dil kerta hai tujhey kuttay k agay dal dun
samnay wala passenger:wao wao wao wao!!!




one girl asked to pappu

1 girl ask 2 pappu : woh kia hai jo cow k paas 4 or mere paas 2 hain?
pappu : legs
Girl : woh kia hai jo tumhari pant main hai aur meri pant mein nahi hai?
pappu: paisay
Girl : woh kia hai jo log din main karne k bajaye ko raat bistar pe kartay hain
pappu: neend puri karte hain
girl : woh kia hai jo larki pehli daffa karwate huye pain
ki wajah se roti hai?
pappu : kaan main ched
MORAL : aap bhi apni zehniat pappu ki tarhan saaf rakhain




Tujhey sub pata hai

Child:papa aunty ka pait kion phola hai?
Father:tujhey sub pata hai!
Child: nahin pata promise!
Father: in k pait main pani bhara hay
CHILD:Oh No! Bacha to doob jaye ga!

Biwi pani se bohat darti hai

Sardar : Yar meri biwi pani se bohat darti hai.
Friend : Acha wo kaise?
Sardar : Yar kal mein ghar gaya to wo bathtub
mai bhi security guard k sath bethi thi.!!

Itnay saray bachay aik sath

Teacher: Bacho batao k billi 1 sath itnay
saray bachay kaisay paida karti hay?
Kid: Miss agar aap road pay billi ki
tarah ghoomo to aap ko pata chal jayega…

Musharaf Reema ka haath pakar kar bola

Musharaf Reema ka haath pakar kar bola:
“Aao kamray mein chalain”
Reema; “Ki faida, wardi tey tu lani nai”

Larki aa rahi hay ya ja rahi hay

Girl to boy: Tum larkay kisi larki mei
sub se pehlay kia daikhte ho ?
Boy: Yeh tou depend karta hai k
larki aa rahi hay ya ja rahi hai …:p

Boy:chalo kisi sunsaan/viraan jagah chaltey hain!

Boy:chalo kisi sunsaan/viraan jagah chaltey hain!
Girl:tum aisi-waisi harkat to nahi karoge?
Boy:bilkul nahi!
Girl:to phir rehne do…

aaj tumhein akeiley mein….


aaj tumhein akeiley mein…
le ja kar…
apney hontoon se eik…
k…
ki…
kis..
kiss…
kissa sunaon bili aur chohey ka……….



pehlay hath mai lo, phir mun mai …

pahlay hat ma lo
phir mon mai lo
phir thook lagao
phir sidha karoo
phir sorakh ma daloo
uff..
kithna muskhil ha soi mai dagha dalna

Us nay kaha aur dabao

us ne kaha or dabao,
main dabaya,
us ne kaha or dabao,
main ne or dabaya,
us ne kaha baniyan nikal do phir dabao,
main ne phir dabaya,
us ne kaha pent bhi nikal do phir dabao,
main ne phir dabaya . . . Â
dekha ho gya na suit case band:)

Aik bar karo na plz…

Aik bar karo na plz..
kisi ko pata nahi chalega..
plz karo naaa……..
muje acha lage ga…
aik bar hamari dosti ki khatri
kar do na plzz…
aik pyara sa SMS!!!

Teri sula ke lu?


teri sula ke lu?
ya bitha ke lu?
ya tujhe karu khada
ya fir teri juka-jukake lu?
ab tu hi bata
ki mein teri…
photo kaise lu.